Happy Anniversary

I'm married 14 years today. I can't believe it, really. Not that it has flown by, I mean, I have 3 kids - we have accomplished a lot! It's just that I can't believe we made it this far. Does this mean it's forever? I keep looking for that year - that when you reach it you say - well, we have made it this far, we are together forever. I want the guarantee.

I know people that divorced after 35 years. Why would you stay together that long? You must have known that there were problems. What the hell. Stay together for the kids? Not a good idea. But, I can't imagine only seeing my kids every other week. It would have to be really bad.

But it's not bad. It's pretty damn good. I'm happy.

Let's look at the postives:
He loves me. Unconditionally from all I can tell.
He puts up with my moods.
He makes me laugh.
He teaches my kids all the details about throwing a baseball or football.
He does my daughters hair.
He loves my family.
We like the same restaurants.
We love vacations - with or without kids.
We have fun just the two of us.

What more can I ask? That he deal with more of the "housekeeping" with the house and kids, i.e. home improvements - shouldn't he handle these, and daycare during school closing - just once? Maybe he should deal with these things more often, but would I trade all of the above for that? I hope not.

"FREE"

Okay, this is too funny. My neighbors across the street are moving.

"Am I sad" you may ask, well no, I'm not. I've lived here 11 years and the only time we have spoken to these neighbors was when I backed out of my driveway, eyes blurred with tears after putting my middle son on the bus to Kindergarten, and ran into the wife's car. DUH! I was so scared, but the wife was very nice. Have not spoken to them since, and my son will be entering 2nd grade this month.

Okay, so they are moving next weekend and just this afternoon, they put a load of "stuff" on the side of the road with a "FREE" sign posted.
Example of items:
plastic sleds
particle board closet
grass seed spreader (2)
small satellite dish
black trash bag filled with who knows what
lawn chairs
etc.

I have been in my home office on conference calls since this stuff appeared, 1 1/5 hours ago. Within the first half hour, the sleds were gone, 1 spreader, the lawn chairs, a weed whacker and if you can believe it, the trash bag. WHAT WAS IN THAT? The guy that stopped got out, grabbed a few things, got back in his car - then got back out. He grabbed the sleds and the trash bag.

Gotta love this. It's too funny.

Oh yeah, I called my other neighbor, the friend neighbor, on my cell (I'm on a conference call remember?) and asked her to grab me the last spreader. Hey, free stuff!

Summer Vacation

Yesterday was the first day of summer vacation. I was talking to my husband on Sunday and complaining about having to work. It wasn't fair to the kids. Shouldn't they be able to have summer vacations like I did, sleeping late, hanging out, riding bikes to the pool with a dollar for a soda and a frozen Charleston Chew?

Yes, they do, they deserve more than a summer filled with camps day after day, week after week. Still having to get up in the morning by a certain time. Me still having to fill backpacks with lunches, snacks and gatorade.

Time to look at the budget. There must be a way for me to stay home. People I know live on much less than my husband makes. What do they do? I don't consider myself extravagant, so how can we do it?

Monday morning, 9:11 am. My oldest son says "Mom, I'm bored. There is nothing to do."

I laugh out loud.

"Get your brother, basketball camp starts in an hour."

Do I deserve a vacation?

I'm going on vacation. Without my husband. Without my kids. Just me and some friends. A real vacation. Not a business trip extension. Not a "family visit" vacation. A real, grown-up vacation. Alone. Well, not really. I'm going with three friends, but it feels like I'm going alone. I was afraid to tell my mother-in-law. What would she think? I'm so selfish that I'm leaving her baby boy and my kids to jaunt across the country with a guy and 2 other girls? She who raised six kids single handedly with nary a vacation or a night out? Imgine my surprise when she said "Good for you! You deserve it." Not only that, she is helping out with babysitting and sending me e-mails telling me to have a good time.

Still, I feel guilty. Okay, so my mother-in-law is for it, but what about my husband? He was less than thrilled when I announced, "Hey, guess what? Danny invited me on a ski trip to Banff!" He was practically asleep at the time and I had woken him up to tell him this great, selfish news, but couldn't he say something more supportive than "I thought we didn't have any money?" We don't have any money, but the trip is practically free. I know he was jealous, hell, I would be, but for some reason, he could not say he was jealous. Why is that? I would be saying it every day. I would be supportive of him taking his trip, as I was last year when he went to visit the same friend in Texas, but I would admit that I wish it was me. I have no problem admitting that I'm jealous. Or that I'm mad or angry or pissed off for that matter. He can't. He feels guilty and thinks he should not be jealous. Hmmm. One of our many, many differences.

The kids want to go. Of course. They all ski and here I am saying Mommy is going on a great ski trip and you can't come. Funny, they haven't really asked why or why isn't daddy going or anything like that. Guess kids just take some things as final. Wish they would be that way about no more ice cream or tv.

I still feel guilty, but not guilty enough to stay home.